Posterity is why I write this journal. There’s no other reason. I enjoy poetry and have been writing it all of my life. Well, mostly. There have been times when the responsibilities of life have caused me to drift away from it. Like marriage and raising a family. It’s the “real” parts of life like that which hits you like a ton of bricks. Like when your first child is born. That is a scary moment. Suddenly you are going from a carefree dude who only needs to worry about his own welfare to a Dad, who now has a completely new life to care for. And if you are really all encompassing like I was, then you worry about the welfare of the child’s mother also. All of a sudden your life transforms from doing whatever you want to do into whatever it takes to secure the safety, health, welfare, and happiness of an entire family. And that can sometimes become overwhelming. And it never goes away.
Recently my vehicle’s transmission broke down for the second time in 5 months. Although it is still under warranty and will likely be repaired for free, it still worries me that my livelihood will be affected by an untrustworthy vehicle. After all, a way to get around is the most important part of a 21st century career. So I purchased a new vehicle at what I think is an ungodly amount of money. Of coarse it’s an economy vehicle and I absolutely hate it. But once I squeeze my fat butt into this tiny vehicle I’m fairly confident that it will get me safely where I need to go.
The problem is that I’m still in Dad mode. I worried so intensely over the purchase of this vehicle that it caused me to have a panic attack, which completely wore my body physically down and I slept for 12 hours. Spending money can sometimes let off steam. Spending awful gads of money can build up steam though – because that is not consistent with responsibility.
I’m a little better now that it’s 5 or 6 days into the purchase. But I’m still certain that this worry will last longer than the car itself. I hate that.
Other than poetry I’ve had another lifelong passion – electricity. Well, not so much electricity as a passion to make it more efficient. I feel like we all have a responsibility to make this world better in any way we can, and I believe God gives every one of us an insight on how to do that. Since my early 20’s I’ve been interested in making electricity more efficient. My early thoughts and trials were based mostly on the idea that motion is necessary to create electricity. And motion is what causes us to burn fossil fuels to turn generators, essentially dumping poison into our atmosphere at tons upon tons everyday. Dangerous nuclear reactors are sprouting up everywhere and political tensions between countries makes us concerned that some of them aren’t really concerned with power-grade uranium enrichment, but rather weapons grade. So I can easily see how our world could end in a fiery ball over that alone. And so I spent my 20s and 30s trying to make motion more efficient.
During the last 10 or 15 years though I’ve come to believe that motion is not necessary to generate electricity. Obviously we already have gadgets like solar panel collectors that can generate electricity without motion. But I’m talking about a much simpler way of generating electricity at far lower costs than solar. Instead of motion, I believe that electricity is generated by the saturation and desaturation of an electrical conduit, like copper wire. Motion has just been used thus far to accomplish that. But thinking outside the box anyone could easily find other ways to accomplish saturation and desaturation without motion. And that means without burning fuel or erecting dangerous nuclear sites whose wastes will last longer than the planet.
A lot of people call me pseudo-scientific or simply a crackpot. Let me tell you why that doesn’t stop me:
Recently I watched one of the TED Talks where a nano-scientist was talking about the reason he got into the field he is in. He reached into his wallet and pulled out a 20 year old newspaper clipping showing a young girl in Sudan dying of thirst. Yes. Thirst. He said he has carried that clipping with him everyday for the past 20 years. It drives him to find discoveries of new technologies because our current knowledge will not be able to handle the waning sources of fresh water over the next 100 to 200 years. And so we already see people dying of thirst in our own time – he sees massive death and destruction coming in the future. He fights, claws, and scratches every day to try and avoid that, and so he says it doesn’t matter what the naysayers think as he courageously seeks an answer within the fray of their nonsensical and egotistical bombardment.
Nicola Tesla is the man who created our current electrical grid and radio waves. Yet most people don’t know that because Thomas Edison publicly lambasted Tesla as a crackpot. Galileo was actually arrested and kept on house arrest until he died because he believed that the earth was not the center of the universe. Socrates was executed for failing to believe in the Greek gods. Christopher Columbus was considered by many to be a fool for believing the earth was round. Giordano Bruno was burned at the stake for having thoughts outside of mainstream Christianity. The Catholic Pope at the time is the person who sentenced him to death.
And so I, too, couldn’t care less what the naysayers have to think about my science. I have a vision and will spend my life trying to better this world before I leave it. Even if I fail then I will have at least tried, which I think is still better than sitting around lambasting others for trying. When I think about it, that is just a sad little way to live ones’ life.